In Heaven, there's plenty of beer, if you want it

Thinking of missing loved ones this holiday season

Last week marked two Christian holy days, All Saints Day and All Souls Day. They are often celebrated together as they are both days to remember and honor those who have preceded us in death. (Hallowe’en gets thrown into the mix, too, as it is the eve of All Souls.) We honor these people whether they were mentioned in the Bible, received formal canonization for their service to the church and others, or simply mattered to the people around them. The celebrations got me thinking about a lot of things.

A lot of Christians have a notion of heaven based in a few verses in the Book of Revelation: pearly gates, golden roads, pretty and puffy clouds everywhere, and St. Peter checking everyone in. Intellectually, I know it’s not true, but personally, I like the idea. I like to think of my father, my Uncle Pat, and my Uncle Ed cruising around in one of Uncle Pat’s Thunderbirds, going to sports bars that aren’t too loud, have Guinness on tap, and feature big TV screens showing the Cleveland Browns winning yet another Super Bowl.

My baby brother Paul died earlier this year, and I started imagining him in the back seat of Uncle Pat’s T-bird. He seemed so unhappy being stuck with these old men who listened to bad music and cheered on the Browns win because, after all, Paul was a Pittsburgh Steelers fan. I told my sister about this, and she pointed out that my vision was worse than I thought: my father would be so mad at Paul for being there.

As soon as she said that, I could hear my dad yelling. “What the hell are you doing here, boy?”

My sister had an alternate vision of heaven for our brother. In it, Paul, Pittsburgh great Franco Harris, and Bob Sobota, a family friend who also loved the Steelers, were sitting in super comfy recliners, drinking beer, and watching the Steelers win the Super Bowl. It’s heaven, so why couldn’t both teams be champions?

Bob Sobota, it should be mentioned, died in his recliner while watching TV, with a Rolling Rock beer in his hand. He was one of the good ones.  

In the United States, Hallowe’en kicks off a long holiday season, with something for everyone. Diwali! Thanksgiving! Hanukkah! Our Lady of Guadalupe! Christmas! Kwanza! New Year’s! Elvis’s Birthday! And I’m sure I’ve missed a few. We’re going to be exhausted by the time Martin Luther King Jr.’s birthday rolls around. These feast days will be both joyous and painful because we all have empty seats at our tables.

How do you imagine your deceased loved ones? Are they floating around the clouds, have they been reborn as someone cool, or are they haunting their enemies? Let us know!